Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Story #100 - Doing Everything Wrong

Hello! This is the 100th story posted to the Land of Bad Decisions blog since it was started in 2007. That is kind of cool I think! I have had some amazing contributions, which you can see from the links on the right hand side under "Stories By Author." I'm very glad to have reached this number, despite the fact that it is essentially trivial.

Now is also a good time to announce that I am taking a bit of a hiatus from LOBD for the near future. Writing these stories has increasingly taken a lot of time and energy from me, and I am afraid that I am drying out once again. And to be honest, I am not getting nearly enough submissions to keep this site running.

The whole point of this blog was to reach out to other writers and artists and see what they come up with, when using the first two sentences to start. That from the phrase "I wanted to live in the land of bad decisions," you could get a variety of interpretations from different voices. But I don't think that I have been able to cultivate that kind of site here. I am thankful for everyone who submitted, as I really enjoyed reading and publishing your stories and poems. But I think that in order to expand the site, I am going to have to take a step back.

So please, if you have a submission, send it to me and it will go up on this site. I might come back with another story at some time, but I am not sure when. The best way to keep updated is to follow my twitter.

In the meantime, enjoy today's story, and when I come back for a third time I hope to make this site what I wanted it to be from the beginning.


Doing Everything Wrong
by Dan Schwartz

I wanted to live in the land of bad decisions. In order to live in the land of bad decisions, you have to make some bad decisions.

I woke up today and decided that I was going to do everything wrong. It didn't matter what it was, if I could do it in completely the wrong way then I would.

So any decision I made basically, I hope was the wrong one. Like for example when I got up and started walking. Well I thought, I can do this wrong, and fell to the floor, tripping over something very small, and being unable to make it past the door. I wondered if I should put clothes on, and I thought at first I wouldn't, but instead decided to put the wrong clothes on the wrong parts of the body. It seemed to make more sense. I skipped breakfast, eating only a gravel rock from outside.

I got into my car, put in reverse, and smashed it into another car. I did not apologize. I sat there for a little while, thinking about things. Then I opened the passenger's side door and crawled out. I saw a sewer drain and I thought, today's the day. I managed to fit one leg, then two, down the gutters, and pushed the rest of my body down. It's a good thing that I didn't eat.

When I made it to the sewer, I splashed around in the water, getting my clothes good and wet. It smelled awful, but I made myself stay for a very long time, until the patches of light on the wall had moved quite a bit. Then I crawled out the way I had come in, which was much harder.

It was getting late, and I was exhausted, so I thought I might take a nap. But I couldn't, not this way. I had to bash my head against a tree first. Then prop myself up with my legs, like I was doing a handstand. I rested against the bark of that tree, smelling of the sewer, blood starting to form, and I thought: Today has been a good day.