by Dan Schwartz
I wanted to live in the land of bad decisions. In order to live in the land of bad decisions, you have to make some bad decisions.
I had only a few hours left! What to do! Skydiving is ofcourse the answer! But was there a way to do it... backwards???z??z?????/??/?? OF COURSE there is. So it's easy, just had to free myself from earthly bonds and the law of "gravity" (psh) and then that's it! You just need an airplane to "catch" you. NO PARACHUTE REQUIRED. Just watch out for blades... of GLORY! No wait, just blades, actually just watch out for blades.
Anyway I tried it. First I prepared by skydiving regularly, from one plane... to ANOTHER plane. SMART! No hiccups. So then it was time. I made sure the plane was above. I was the person. I would be the one. I released myself from "gravity" (again, psh) and dove upwards! You've never had an experience like this let me tell you. The only thing is you definitely need to time the "catch" right or the plane will miss you and you will have to reinstate "gravity" (oh yeah, that thing) and then it's just regular skydiving. So uh yeah you might actually want a parachute after all? It turns out